Hey hey hey, Browns fans, it is Week 3 and time for your Browns Friday Fumble!
Your Brownies are coming off of a tough one last week in Baltimore. The Ravens defense kind of had their way with the Browns, forcing turnovers, headaches, and just an overall bad day. One positive thing about the game, though, is that you probably had some good snacks while you watched it. And isn’t that the real gift? Also the Indians are still really, really good, so you can take some comfort in that.
Quarterbacking problems of the Cleveland Browns that have plagued us since week 1 of 1999 have been unequivocally SOLVED, ladies and gents! It’s time to celebrate! With Kevin Hogan putting up some SIGNIFICANT stats over the weekend, it looks like Cleveland finally has a man to build upon. Let’s break it down:
- 83 yards! That’s 83% of the total football field length!!!
- A passing touchdown! That’s 100% more passing touchdowns than former starter Deshone Kizer has had ALL YEAR LONG folks!!
It’s time to put the pin in this one, folks. Kevin Hogan’s Heroes is the answer to the question we’ve been asking.
Browns rookie Myles Garrett is still out with an high ankle sprain, but word around Berea is that he is no longer in his walking boot; just a wrap. So that is good. That didn’t stop him from sitting down at a desk in his bedroom with only the desk light on and putting a pen to paper in this week’s Poem from the Sidelines.
Know Your Foe: Indianapolis Colts
We all know the face of the franchise in Indy is Right Gaurd Jack Mewhort, but they have a lot of contributors who don’t always get the coverage they deserve. Sure the team has underperformed as of late. And sure the front office vocally chides their star QB for the salary that they gave him. But I’m sure things are going just fine down there in Indy.
- Seinfeld star Anthony “George” Castonzo
- Lord of the Rings Creator Scott “JRR” Tolzien
- Hotel owner T.Y. Hilton
- Inconvenient Running Back Frank Gore
- Contest-Winning Music Megastar Kamar Aiken
- And at center Bond, Deshawn Bond
- “Night Court” Star Henry Anderson
- Creator of “The Wire” John Simon
- The Doors frontman Antonio Morrison
- Inventor of the stapler Jon Bostic
- Original first-overall pick of the Browns, Vontae Davis
- Sesame Street Monster Grover Stewart
And on special teams, please note that Adam Vinateieri is 44 years old.
Week 3 Predictions
Dave: OK, for real this time. The Browns are going to majorly right the ship in a major way this week. The Colts aren’t very good. I just read that they don’t even have Peyton Manning anymore. Or Reggie Wayne. Without those two key players I don’t see them competing with the Browns. DeShone Kizer is going to light them up for at least four touchdowns. Browns win, 35-6
Dylan: Holy Canoli, guys. The Carmel, Indiana Colts are the powerhouse of the 2007 AFC. This team will certainly be making a deep run into the playoffs, and I don’t expect the rest of their division to be putting up ANY bit of a fight. Fortunately for us, we just discovered phenom Kevin Hogan’s Heroes last week, and won’t let these Carmel, Indiana Colts gallop themselves through this new-look Cleveland D Train! It’s going to be a real Wild West showdown this Sunday, featuring the gunslinger majesty of the Colts Offense up against the hawkish Cleveland secondary.
BROWNS WIN AND PUT A BIG FAT STAPLE INTO THE 2007 COLTS SEASON, 26-17!
Yazan: I have a co-worker who is step cousins with Andy Luck but he is hurt. Andy Luck is a big soccer fan and his dad was the president of the Houston Dynamo. Andy went to the 2014 World Cup. For these reasons I would predict a Colts win, but Andy is not so Lucky and is injured. So the Browns will win by 16 — the number of saves Tim Howard had against Belgium in the 2014 World Cup