Mike Pettine thankfully brushes off Manziel laughter talk
October 7, 2014Cleveland Browns vs. Tennesssee Titans: Behind the Box Score
October 7, 2014Phil Taylor has caught a lot of flack this season for his play this year. He has abandoned gaps, missed assignments, and slanted here when he should have stunted there. He left the Browns’ comeback victory over the Titans with an injury, and the Browns defense seemed to improve in his absence. The refrain on sports radio Sunday evening was very “Taylor got hurt and the defense got better WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU?”
This, however, is not a discussion of Phil Taylor, football player. This is a discussion of Phil Taylor, chronicler of culture and dominator of social media. Per @philtaylor98 on Instagram, this was the scene in the Browns’ locker room after coming back to beat the Tennessee Titans:
A beautiful scene, no? This team dug itself a Fat Elvis-sized pit in Tennessee, only to climb out with victory in hand. They earned it. There are some who think they should have won more comfortably, but that’s misguided. Haven’t we seen enough to know that any victory—especially a road victory—is not to be taken for granted? This team has gone 1-7 on the road in each of the past three seasons.
But they won this one, and we should revel in it, if only for a moment, before moving on to Pittsburgh. There’s a lot going on in Big Phil’s video, and it requires multiple viewings to fully understand. With that in mind, critical analysis of the Browns post-game locker room dance party:
The soundtrack for this bacchanalia is “Throw It Up” by Lil Jon & the East Side Boyz, who have managed to stay relevant for over a decade. In a strange sense, Lil’ Jon is someone the Browns should be emulating. He has built a decade of musical existence upon three words.
If he can squeeze ten years of success out of a few catchphrases, why can’t the Browns cobble together something similar? Instead of what, yeah, and okay, they have an offensive line, some running backs, and an increasingly competent-looking quarterback. Surely the defense and supporting cast can contribute as much as the East Side Boyz and Pastor Troy.
I would be remiss if I did not mention that Phil included #CadiacKids in this video’s description. There, now I’ve mentioned it, and done so without comment. Onward!
Brian Hoyer is at the center of the party, and rightly so. He threw for 292 yards, three touchdowns, and he led the Browns back from 25 points down. It was the largest comeback by a road team in league history.
If we are correct in assuming that Brian Hoyer has eyes, ears, or at least a sense of the general zeitgeist, then he knows that this wasn’t expected of him. He wasn’t meant to be this good. We wanted him to succeed, sure, but no way he was a history-making leader. He was only supposed to be a fleeting feel-good story, a bridge for us to cross on our way into Johnnyland.
Mr. Hero may have some honey badger in his DNA, because he don’t care. He piped up at halftime in Pittsburgh and nearly engineered a huge comeback there. His Browns have averaged 26.8 points in his seven starts, and have scored at least 21 points in all but one. Hoyer has led with no hesitation since his very first start, as described in this bit from David Fleming’s ESPN story:
On the eve of his first start, inside the team hotel in Minnesota, Hoyer pulled tight end Jordan Cameron aside and launched into a laundry list of scribbled hot reads, tips and tendencies. For starters, Hoyer had noticed that a 7-route, or a post/corner route, would work really well for the 6-5 Cameron against the Vikings’ cover 2 scheme because of the way, on film, Minnesota’s shorter corners tended to fall off underneath. “At first it was kinda like, ‘Who is this guy in my face giving me orders?'” Cameron says. “This is the backup to the backup, but Brian had this immediate, demanding presence about him. And sure enough, all those things came up in the game-and we used them to our advantage. After that, it was like, ‘I believe in this guy.'”
Brian Hoyer does not care about who or what he was supposed to be. He’s leading his hometown club, and he’s having fun doing it. He leapt into the middle of the celebratory fray—offense and defense and special teams all—and unabashedly busted out what Instagram user @avenida24 called “that 2:00 am W. 6th dive bar shimmy.” You can see the joy in Karlos Dansby, Chris Kirksey, Craig Robertson and the rest of the team as their QB joins the party. Imagine Brandon Weeden doing all of this without hurting your brain.
Speaking of which, Dansby, Kirksey, Robertson, and Johnson Bademosi deserve credit for ring-leading this whole thing. They’re in the middle of the action and are deciding who is granted access to the hallowed center. They are the wind stoking the locker room fire.
It’s taken eight years, but Joe Thomas is finally coming out of his shell. He’s been a great player since joining the Browns, but it’s always felt like he was an arm’s length away. Beyond his affinity for fishing and his impeccable footwork in pass protection, he’s remained an enigma, likely by choice. But now, Joe is flashing some personality. He got into it with Titans defenders this past week. He jumped into a training camp fight over the summer. He was among those next to Hoyer speaking at halftime of the Steelers game. And now, he’s showing off that footwork while crip-walking through the locker room and twirling athletic tape.
He has long been a leader on the field, but now he’s going all-out. Thomas’ offensive line mates Joel Bitonio and Alex Mack stay on the outside looking in during this impromptu brown and orange ball. At this rate, #TeamOLSwag will never match #TeamDBSwag. With any hope at all, they will be inspired by their left tackle and enroll in local dance classes ASAP.
Happy b day 2 my brother @bossward43!! Glad we came in together! Much love! #teamDbSwag http://t.co/PuaU8Wl0 — Joe Haden (@joehaden23) December 12, 2012
And how about Jim Leonhard getting after it? He didn’t get a scholarship offer coming out of high school, so he walked on at Wisconsin. He wasn’t drafted, but he won a spot on the Bills roster. He’s all of 5-foot-8, and he’s now a 10-year veteran. This man worked his ass off to be a professional football player, and he deserves to celebrate as much as anyone in the whole league. So kudos to Jim, he who looks drunk with joy in the video, throwing his hands in the air and waving them like he just don’t care.
Perhaps underrated in this video is Donte Whitner. Like Hoyer, he is a local kid turned leader. Unlike Hoyer, he is content to simply watch this bro-down, like a proud papa after a Little League game. Whitner is only 29, hardly a graybeard, but he is the third-oldest member of the defense behind Dansby and Leonhard. He has embraced his seniority and become the skipper of the secondary. He might have danced as a younger man, but now he is well into his Wise LeBron phase.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wfqpsdcyOAQ
Absent from this video is Johnny Manziel. Given his ability to always be in the shot, this is a curious omission. We learned Friday that Johnny misses college, so one would think that he would love to jump into the middle of this moment of fraternity. Unless he’s hiding somewhere in the background—which is no place for him, really—then he chose to stay away. I, for one, am a little worried. If ever there were a time for Johnny to go full Tonya Harding on Hoyer’s Nancy Kerrigan, now would be it.
Last but not least, this guy.
The upside-down visor may never make it out of the 90s, but this was as good a time as any to give it a shot. Now let’s beat the damn Steelers.
47 Comments
I wanna know more about upside-down visor guy. Has he been waiting for this moment for years? “Finally, a chance to test out the upside-down visor look!” I’m hopeful he makes it into Phil’s next video after the Browns beat Pittsburgh.
Where was Jordan Cameron, no seriously where is Jordan Cameron?
Upside-down visor guy is most likely one of JFFs bros.
Johnny was not dancing because he doesn’t care. He laughs when he shouldn’t and doesn’t dance when he should. This is very obvious to the naked observer.
He looks like Chris Tabor the special teams coach.
Good call!
http://media.cleveland.com/plutoblog_impact/photo/johnson-tabor-minicamp-2012-squ-jkjpg-7dff6d7a8dde9ed9.jpg
“Imagine Brandon Weeden doing all of this without hurting your brain.”
Impossible…
Caption: “Darius, I’m telling you, no really, one day Ima flip this visor upside down. You watch.”
Hot buttered cheesesteak, waffles fries and cheese sauce. Besides the obligatory Swenson’s run, Mr. Hero is a required stop during my visits home.
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Stop it I miss my Swenson’s but agree with your Mr. Hero order especially the waffles and cheese!
My life is actually at risk for what I’m about to say, but . . .
Living in close proximity to Philly, and having had many meals there, I have yet to eat a cheesesteak that is as good as those from Mr. Hero.
https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xfp1/t31.0-8/c0.29.851.315/p851x315/981385_10152555907496252_4702922308942391183_o.jpg
the non-veiled shot across Craig’s bow. love it.
defense is better this year without Phil Taylor
offense is better this year without Jordan Cameron
Just how it is so far.
waffle fries with the vinegar packets. chik-fil-a is great for many things here, but the lack of vinegar packets has always been worrisome.
vinegar packets wtf? cheese sauce all the way!
50% is not acceptable..the defense is better, huh, what?
?why are those mutually exclusive?
Seriously Bode, just apologize for the vinegar packet thing, eat your greasy, greasy Mr. Hero sandwich with artery-hardening cheese sauce on your fries, and we’ll forget the vinegar comment ever happened, ok?
I worked at Swensons for 3 years in high school, and then i would work when i came home from BGSU on breaks summers etc. even after all that, i could still eat swensons every day of my life. Is it a sin that i have never had a roman burger? or eaten at Mr. Hero?
You aren’t missing much with the Romanburger the cheesesteak is better although it’s not the same cheesesteak they served when I was younger. Much like life it shrunk!
I’m sure the rest of my fellow Americans would agree with me and not you. Vinegar? C’mon man!
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umm…can you tell me the first ingredient in the Clevelander condiment of choice? here I’ll even give you a link:
http://store.mustardmuseum.com/product/bertman-original-ballpark-mustard/buy-mustards
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did the defense look better in the 1st half with Phil Taylor(28pts scored against) or the 2nd half w/o him (0pts against)?
#small_sample_size
the Swenson’s thing absolves you. Go in peace. But grab some Mr. Hero while you’re out.
I prefer the vinegar applied misted with a spray bottle, county fair style. But packets work in a pinch.
Mmmm, Romanburger…
http://www.gifsoup.com/view3/1637422/drool-o.gif
One more vote for vinegar.
http://cdn.newsday.com/polopoly_fs/1.6162116.1380558056!/httpImage/image.JPG_gen/derivatives/mugshot_231/image.JPG
I spray the air and then gently walk the waffle fry through it.
this is inducing a laughing fit. In the part of me that is forever stuck in the 8th grade.
you shouldn’t be so hasty. numbers are currently 4-2 in favor of vinegar.
http://img.pandawhale.com/100843-and-that-concludes-the-lesson-iI2h.gif
That’s for hot dogs we’re talking WAFFLE FRIES!!!
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misted with a spray bottle
yuppy! your vote is thrown out.
This is an illegal vote and my Republican lawyers will be filing an injunction immediately! Stop pressuring the voters with that voodoo that you do!
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#samplesizebasedoncharliewhitehurstthrowingoneverydownwithnorunsupport
It’s not a sin, but it is a very deep character flaw.
Shall we compare Whitehurst with phil versus without?
Wrong. It’s for nearly everything
http://media.tumblr.com/137e40e45f589354370d4a9ca05aedb2/tumblr_inline_mro2xeglrN1qz4rgp.gif
You asked for it jabroni:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rRddLDynsCs
Hmmm… Cameron has had some injury this year, but outside of two games last year, all of his games were with Josh Gordon stretching the field. My opinion is, if the Browns can be 6-4 when Josh Gordon comes back (or better yet, 7-3 due to the weak upcomind schedule but difficult season finish), we will need cameron in the middle if they aim to take Gordon away deep. We need Cameron and Gordon to finish the year. Of course, I am hoping this years 2-2 browns do not go 2-10 down the stretch, but I think they will do better than that, and how much better depends on if the D can improve and we can score with Cameron, Gordon, and the run game if we have to “outscore” to win due to a poorer defense than expected.
>>>I, for one, am a little worried. If ever there were a time for Johnny to go full Tonya Harding on Hoyer’s Nancy Kerrigan, now would be it.>>>
nicely done.